Couples Alive

Couples Alive is our renowned 4-day program for couples. If you’re wanting more out of your primary relationship and are prepared to go beyond the familiar to find it, Couples Alive is for you!​

“I went with a laundry list of grievances and doubts about my partner and left reminded of the huge range of options available to ground myself, see my role, be more boundaried and loving. I feel so much more love, and understood.” 

– Andrew, Couples Alive

Couples Alive is our core offering for people in a primary relationship. Much of what makes Come Alive (our core program for individuals) so unique and transformative underpins these programs, but with a distinctly couples focus. With support and guidance from highly skilled leaders, you will learn and practice The Haven’s proprietary models for communicating and relating with your partner and learn from the diversity of experience around you. All couples meet together during the day and into the evenings, with breaks for relaxation, connection, or adventure in between. In addition to group activities, experiential learning, and discussion, the program leaders offer coaching and feedback to each couple when possible.

“It was a pivotal moment in our relationship – we went to The Haven as the last straw before separation. We are now so much more connected and very, very hopeful about a happier future together. Such an amazing experience.”

-J., Couples Alive

Take advantage of a $500 per couple discount for this program in 2024!!

Have you strengthened your relationship foundation in Couple Alive and are looking for the next step? Couples Alive 2 is about igniting passion and aliveness together and is part 2 in our Haven core series for people in primary relationship.

“What we’ve noticed in our relationship since attending Couples Alive Foundation:

  1. we are more loving and accepting of each other
  2. we have more effective ways of communicating and setting boundaries
  3. we are both happy to be living together and miss each other when we are apart
  4. there is more physical affection between us

I’d say that taking Couples Alive has saved our relationship from ending, we have learned how to be more happy and relaxed together.”

– S. H., Couples Alive series participant

When we first meet someone, and increasingly as the stakes go up, we do our best to be seen in a positive light. It is in these exciting, and often-uneasy, times that we begin to establish the range of who and how we are in our relationship.

If we suppress ourselves to make our relationship work, we are likely to experience resentment, distance, distrust and anxiety. Alternatively, each person’s fully acknowledged and expressed presence can become the foundation of a solid, loving relationship. Through this process we begin to build the faith in ourselves and each other to relate at an edge of aliveness and discovery.

Passionate expression and healthy power-struggle can help establish growth and acceptance – as individuals and as a couple. In this program couples work to identify and share personal characteristics, beliefs and behaviours;  go beyond ‘good-bad’ judgments, and explore how these traits can be embraced to enhance relationship.

In Couples Alive 2 you will:

  • Experience more energy, pleasure and edge
  • Develop a healthy approach to power struggles
  • Learn ways to create personal safety and location
  • Build solid ground for relating through risk, compassion and curiosity
  • Broaden and deepen their range of intimacy
  • Create an open and accepting environment for each person

Couples Alive program highlights:

  • 4 focused days together improving, revitalizing, and expanding your relationship
  • A chance to get away and visit Gabriola, one of BC’s most accessible gulf islands
  • In-depth exploration and application of our tried-and-tested Communication Model from a distinctly couples perspective
  • Many years of continued success with hundreds of diverse couples
  • A truly unique approach to relationships developed – and lived – by our founders, Dr. Ben Wong and Dr. Jock McKeen
  • A variety of breathing and body-awareness experiences that you can take home to continue nurturing your connection and growth
  • Discovery of your boundaries and development of skills to express wishes, wants and needs
  • Opportunities for self-care and/or quality time together with our oceanfront hot tub, seasonal pool, onsite bodyworkers, gym, meditation room, forest trails, pool table, games, and more…
  • The magic of a diverse group of couples. The opportunity to learn from and relate to others in this setting is both rich and unique
  • Something different from your traditional couples counseling sessions – couples often report accelerated outcomes compared to individual sessions (though we believe there’s a place for both)
  • Coaching and feedback from experienced and professional leadership who are highly trained both at The Haven and in their various professions
  • A program that offers opportunities to continue to learn and grow together…

“We are modeling a healthier relationship for our children. What a legacy!”

 – Lori Appleton, Couples Alive: Foundation


  • We welcome all people in a primary relationship, whether the individuals identify as male, female, non-binary, or any other gender expression
  • Participants will be invited, but not required, to share what’s going on for them and their relationship in the larger group. As with all Haven programs, how you participate is your choice


Couples Alive: Foundation Oct 7-11, 2024 with Graemme Brown and Cathy McNally

Couples Alive 2: Igniting Passion and Aliveness Nov 1-5, 2024 with Susan Clarke and CrisMarie Campbell


Package pricing starts at $3410 per couple, includes tuition, basic room and meals, in the low season.

You can find our cancellation policy here


Your program begins with dinner at 6pm, followed by your first session at 7:30pm

Daily schedule:

  • Breakfast 8:00 – 9:00am
  • Morning session 9:15am to noon
  • Lunch noon to 1:00pm
  • Afternoon session 3:00 – 6:00pm
  • Dinner 6:00 – 7:00pm
  • Evening session 7:30 – 9:30pm

Afternoon and evening sessions can vary.  Your program finishes with lunch on the last day


If you are travelling to Gabriola as a foot passenger on the Gabriola Ferry a shuttle to The Haven can be requested.  Information on this option will be included in your pre-arrival email.

Recommended Resources:

Here are book titles that can complement and enhance your learning in this program. You can purchase when you are at Haven, or order online. Click to learn more:

Review our current Communicable Disease Safety Protocols to keep us all healthy on property.