Laurie Anderson and Kim Hudson are leading The Power of Balance at The Haven, June 5-7.
How often do you find yourself saying how busy you are in one way or another? I caught myself trying to impress my daughter with my busy schedule one day. I had to stop and laugh as she gave me one of those eyeball rolls. I think she was right.Busy-ness is all about direction. Without a strong underpinning of meaning, being busy isn’t that impressive. There I was, telling my daughter that our relationship wasn’t a priority on my schedule, and it didn’t even reflect how I was truly feel. Not even a little bit.
There comes a point where being busy becomes a goal unto itself and you’re not even enjoying that cup of coffee.
There is a growing movement to explore this issue. A group of students write an interesting blog on taking the opportunity while in University to learn how to not drive yourself crazy with busy-ness.
Balanced Leadership recognizes that fear and love needs to be in balance. Working hard, trying to stay ahead of the pack, striving to be vital and valuable as measured by how busy you are, are all manifestations of the fear-based world. Sometimes they are a good thing. It shows an ability to take on challenges and to dig down and accomplish your goals when required. The problem arises when you can’t shut it off. Pushing back against what you fear requires a judicious use of power: not too much, not too little, just right. We call it the Goldilocks principle.
Once you have mastered this delivery of pressure, you need to also master the ability to step off the merry-go-round and recognize that you don’t have to be pushing back all the time. Sometimes you can pull in what you love. Smell the roses, feel appreciation, laugh more.
Pushing and pulling work as the perfect pair, like a saw in action. Before you get busy doing, you need to get a handle on what you love and enjoy being. Before you get busy, take a moment to find what is really important to you so you know you are moving in a good direction. And, no matter how far you are down the wrong path – turn back!! (Great line, but not mine – it is a Tibetan proverb I was told).
To pull in what you love there needs to be play-time. This is one of the best ways to get in touch with what is meaningful to you. Or free time, with moments of stillness. Understanding what is meaningful to you requires a different environment than the fast paced, get-it-done atmosphere of many workplaces. Busy is even the root of the word business and it is all about pushing back against what you don’t want. We need to rethink the good use of our time in the workplace and at home and build in time to pull in what we do want. If you catch yourself feeling you are “not allowed” to goof off, stop for a minute and question that. Maybe you need to be reminded of why you are doing what you are doing and some playful time is exactly what you need.
Balanced Leadership gives you the tools to move easily from the fear-based world of pushing back to the love based-world of pulling in – and vice versa. It gives you the insight to know what is driving you in any given moment and from there you can make some choices. Our next 3-day workshop, The Power of Balance, will be at the Haven June 6,7,8.